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Typical Jan

A few weeks ago, as I was taking our dog, Padmé for a walk, it occurred to me how much I love my wife and what joy that brings to me. I found myself walking with a little spring in my step for the first time in awhile. Yes, I’m still unemployed and Jan was hundreds of miles away on her way to her mom’s funeral. But, there was joy.

You see, the unemployment has brought joy. Joy because it has given us time to spend together. To get to know each other better. Jan is even riding a bike—short rides, but rides nonetheless.

I’ve had some good interviews and even enlisted the help of an interview coach. And I’ve been keeping my eyes open for the Help Wanted posting that reads: Help wanted; prefer 60 year old male…. So, far this has not appeared.

Years ago (and again, just now) I read this is a preface to a book:

A farmer plows his field, sows the seed, and fertilizes and cultivates—all the while knowing that in the final analysis he is utterly dependent on forces outside of himself. He knows he cannot cause the seed to germinate, nor can he produce the rain and sunshine for growing and harvesting the crop. For a successful harvest, he is dependent on these things from God.
Yet the farmer knows that unless he diligently pursues his responsibilities to plow plant, fertilize, and cultivate, he cannot expect a harvest at the end of the season. In a sense he is in a partnership with God, and he will reap its benefits only when he has fulfilled his own responsibilities.
Farming is a joint venture between God and the farmer. The farmer cannot do what God must do, and God will not do what the farmer should do.1

When I re-read this today I thought of waiting. The farmer, once he has done his part can only pray and wait. Recently I had an interview for a position I would love. While I feel fairly positive about it, I don’t know the outcome. Like the farmer, I can only pray and wait. It is in God’s hands.

Which circles back around to joy. As I drove home yesterday I had a sense of joy inside that came from a realization that even if that company says “No,” God’s plan for us is not thwarted. His plan will continue and while I don’t like waiting the “seeds” I have planted are in His capable hands.
1 Jerry Bridges, The Pursuit of Holiness (2006) p. 10